Jigsaw Memoirs- 4

Slowly I started gathering reputation in my work. No-nonsense attitude, hundred percent track records was taking me to new highs. My evolution was faster than the light. Nothing in the whole universe could keep up with my evolution.

I spoke less and thought more.

In this world, having friends amounted to nurturing potential rivals. So, I had none. I was not into daily affairs of the organization. Even we had hierarchy and Departments. Being a sniper was a tough job but extremely enjoyable and satisfying. One needed to be accurate with a non-wavering concentration. There were few More like me and depending upon the timing, locality and expertise we were assigned our respective tasks.

May the demons of invisible inspiration flow through my veins endlessly...it was a pleasure touching the blood of different humans, once they were dead...
At times I wondered, if I am cut in two pieces, instaed of blood oozing out, pieces of that metallic beauty would come out with a sound of bang bang...! Wouldn’t that be a right dedication to the profession I love?!

I was living a double life. I chose arts as my subject because it fascinated me to no end.infact; art and killing were almost similar. Both have no methods, no Logics behind it. But both possess an inherent beauty. One could just feel it. It comes from inside. When one kilss, it kind of paints a beautiful picture. Instead of brush and colors, one uses metallic beauty and blood. And the end product is almost similar.

One always feels, it could have been slightly better. A Bit more refined, a bit more contrast, and few more drops of blood. Now it appears wonderful!
A job well done, finally!
She held my hands and clutched it hard. I felt a lump in my throat. A craving, desire and an eternal wish of losing myself to someone, to Amanda! Her eyes said nothing!
I felt like saying nothing! It was complete dark with few streetlights devouring it of complete dominance. We sat in the garden firmly holding each other’s hand. I felt a touch of her beautiful bosom. She did not react and I kissed on her cheeks.

Goosebumps!
She should have kissed me back...!
She should have refused me!?

Just a silent smile and her whisper followed..."Give me something good to die for... To make it beautiful to live"!

And Mother Nature witnessed a beautiful amalgamation of two broken, thirsty souls...

Her body was carved like marble statues...smooth as silk...not a single flaw…
Eyes started speaking...

“I love you Amanda..! “

It was hard to differentiate between her divine anatomy and purity of dewdrops scattered on surface! Which one was more pure!
The winter fog had given way to summer heat and in a moment of bliss, I had found elixir! I just had an encounter with divine...

I was witnessing a grand scenario of her true self...a placid, calm lake giving way to fiery furnace...one was making me swim and the other was burning me...I Could never decipher which one I enjoyed more...

"I love you even more Amanda...!"

"Daniel, My soul is old but my body is new, you and I are forever eternal, all I have to do is find you. Can you find me as well?"
I needed not to answer...i trusted her to understand from my silence...there was no one else to be trusted...

I could feel her tears rolling out from those magical eyes! It was tears of ecstasy!

I don’t remember how long it lasted but when it did, I felt as if it has just started...

She murmured...What is essential is invisible to the eye...our love...we both are angels with only one wing and we can only fly by embracing each other..

"Daniel, I love you more than you do..."

"I wish..!I just wished...!"
I did not realize that I was falling in trap...a trap of emotions...which further leads to expectation..!
Right through my years, I was this guy with controlled measures...emotions make you more humane but then it also makes you vulnerable to failure..!
No wonder, I was living a beautiful dream...
But, now I had started feeling...emoting...expressing...day dreaming...wanting to have her company all day through...
Meet her...see her...feel her...touch her...smell her...and what not?!

But there was no escape route...!

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"O death, come away, come away!
And in sad world of mine, let me be laid..."

My mother was wailing...i passed through her room...and after years...i heard her voice...!

"Why are you alive?"...
Don’t you get tired of seeing me?
You are worst than our father...!"

She continued for almost an hour...i started feeling a surge of rushing blood in my veins...
I was used to her hateful stares...and it never affected me...
But today everything seemed changed..!

I was living an out of the world experince...my professional life is going good...I am rapidly climbing the hierarchical stairs...

I am in love...
Now everything needs to be perfect..!

I don’t have any idea, where those two melodious sounds of bang bang came from!

"Sound of bang bang...it was a real turn on for me..!"

I had no desire to kill my biological mother..!But I just did...with same precision...and single minded-ness!

But why did not she get tired of hating me!?

Why did not she notice, what you take doesn’t kills you
But she should have been careful about what she was giving!

Her hatred healed me for long..!..Thanks,mother!

I kept her head in my lap for hours...!
Outside, stars were falling like tears from the past!..But let’s keep singing...

"O death, come away, come away!
And in sad world of mine, let me be laid..."

Amen...

"I love you mother...."
Life remained unchanged...and love kept on increasing...to the extent of addiction...
But then, love is always an addiction...you can’t have enough of your beloved..!
Our mornings used to start by calling each other...our nights culminated by calling again...sweet nothings..teasing..understanding..sharing..caring...and finally falling asleep...

We had no choice...so, soon, I and Amanda were shifting together...the distance was getting unbearable...


In between, I committed my first mistake of not finishing a target along with his family...! I spared target's kid...

"Trap of emotions..."